Saturday
The metre has been smashed this week. Ivan Inkling, chief metre analyst of Bozo Investments, expects losses to extend into the coming months. “Who knows how short it could become?”, said Inkling. “During the winter trading period, metres were consistently long, but now they have unexpectedly shortened in terms of both cucumbers and rhubarb. Reports are coming in of a similar trend with carrots.”
Inkling notes that metres are still stable in terms of hay barns and sheds. He cautions investors to beware the metre’s volatility and not to bet the farm.